Running The Option

In football, the option typical means having such versatility that you can elect a variety of running plays. Coaches often run the option when they want to control the game or time of possession. Hmmmmm now let me equate that to relationships. Much of what keeps many of us single is "The Option". For example, one man may be dating 4-7 different women at a time that bring various characteristics to the table. With these women he can control "time of possession" and have offensive control by keeping them in limbo without having to take the risks of "the passing game". In dating many don't like the passing game because you may run the risk of getting picked off. Hmmmmm but sometimes in life it is no nuts no glory and if you want to win the game you have to get out the pocket and scramble or have to throw that hail mary. Yeah you may lose, but what if you win. Pride and self-elusion is keeping many lonely with options. What is the point of having options if you can't rely on the star player. Just something to think about.

New Direction

So I haven't been to work since April 29th and I must say it was the best thing my company could have done for me. I knew when I started that job that it would only be for a season. When I first started I was hired for one position and a few weeks later was promoted into another. I was placed on commitees, given a nice office and great wonderful perks. I was able to travel all over the country and I loved it. But God started to show me that my exit time was getting close. They took away my travel, my office, and their behavior began to change drastically even though my work ethic and results remained the same. I was not moved by the situation, because I knew this was God's way of showing me what needed to happen. Everyday I prayed to God to help me pass all tests and fulfill my assignment. My obedience paid off. I was more than rewarded for my faith and diligence. I have profitted more in the past 3 months than I could have for most of the year. In May I began a joint venture business with my sister and business has really taken off. I have time to spend with my family, on school, and with myself which is invaluable. The best part is money is the least of my worries. I shared that to say this.... things may seem bleak or uncomfortable, but if you seek God and have faith He will bless in a manner that will far surpass your understanding. Be blessed.

What's Your Purpose?

I know it has been a while since I posted, but now that I have some free time I will pick up where I left off. So lately I have been engaging in conversation with a yound gentleman and we have been discussing how culture impacts relationships and things like that. Well today we were talking about knowing your role and what not. My viewpoint on the matter is very simple. I feel that each relationship in which we engaged is meant to serve a purpose. It is meant to teach us something about ourselves and how to proceed with others. So if a man dogged me out, yeah it may have hurt but what I ask mysel. f is what did I contribute and how can I avoid this in the future. There are some guys that I may be friends with and I treat them with care, compassion, and respect and because of the way I treat them they think  I am "the one". This is usually not the case, but it does give them some insight on how they like to be or should be treated. There are women that still act like ladies and have no problem catering to a man if he deserves it. Likewise there are still men who value women and have no problem showing their appreciation. We just have to take the time to understand and learn who those people are in our lives when presented. Just my personal opinion.

The Joys of Motherhood

Two weeks ago it dawned on me that I am about to be the parent of a pre-teen. Along with that comes so many things boys, dating, middle school, peer pressure, and puberty. LAWD I am not ready. It seems like yesterday that I had Justice, but in July it will be 11 years. As her mother I felt I was supposed to teach her all of life's lessons, but she in turn has taught me so much. As a new mother at the age of 20 she taught perserverance to finish college early. She motivated me to keep pushing when I wanted to give up because I refused to be a statistic or to have her to watch me struggle. She has shown me unconditional love, compassion and admiration that I never thought imaginable. These are traits that I am not sure I would have learned as early had God not have given her to me. So to Him I say thank you for entrusting me with such a precious, wonderful gift. At first I thought, why me? Now I know that motherhood is an assignment that all are not entrusted with and many do not do well. So I am humbled and gracious that God saw so much in me and I have enjoyed and will continue to enjoy this wonderful adventure!

The Relationship Rollercoaster

So earlier today I was talking to a male friend of mine who has been on the emotional roller coaster at the Relationship Amusement Park.As I sat and listened to him I started to notice some of the same signs that plagued my last relationship. I past no judgment and he knows that I will be honest and let him know when he is right and when he is wrong. After our conversation I begin to wonder. Why is it that the state of relationships is really so jacked up these days. I truly believe it is because we are a generation that has become so self-absorbed that we don’t know what it is like to be self-less. To love means to be selfless and humble. Not to have the “what have you done for me lately” mentality. It is true, most relationships are one-sided. One partner is usually more willing to give more than the other. My question is how can one proclaim to love someone, but not be their confidante, the one to protect their feelings…. Their FRIEND. A significant other has been reduced to nothing more than an accessory. Men want a woman who is “thick”, “bad”, “a dime” physically, but doesn’t possess any substance. That accessory usually comes at a higher cost. Yes she may be physically appealing, but is she catering to emotional and spiritual needs. Can you talk to and relate to her? And at the end of the day to you righteously like her as a person? Something to think about, huh? Ladies you are not off the hook! Because he looks good on paper by having the great career, lots of money, and willing to trick it off does not show his love for you. Where is attention is, his affection lies. Are you worthy of being kept, loved and being held in high esteem. A self-assessment and some humility are critical if there is any future of preserving love and what it is meant to be. Just my humbled observation and opinion. I am not perfect, but I am willing to work tireless until I get it right because true love is worth it.

ROLLLLLLLL TIDE!

Now that football season has ended, I am now left with a void that can only be filled the excitement and anxiety of college football. More specifically SEC football. Namely Crimson Tide football. I program so steeped in tradition and greatness! It often gets on my nerves when people say "I'm not a Bama fan because they don't play black quarterbacks", or "they didn't hire a black coach", or "Wallace stood in the door and didnt want black students to come in. I often think "Are you seriously THAT stupid?" Wallace's stand in the schoolhouse door took place June 11, 1963. At that time not even Auburn was integrated. Auburn did not enroll its first black student until the following year and that was only one man named Harold Franklin. So please SPARE ME! In 2011 AU is STILL under 10% black, but I digress. The purpose of this blog is to honor the Tide. A team whose program boasts 802 wins, 319 losses, and 43 ties, which is a 71% win percentage. 13 National titles, 26 conference titles (22 of which are SEC titles) in its 118 year history. In 2010, such players as Mark Ingram, Marcell Darius, Marquis Maze, Greg McElroy, Mark Barron, Preston Dial, Darius Hanks, Dont'a Hightower, Julio Jones, Dre Kirkpatrick, Robert Lester, C.J. Mosely, Trent Richardson, Damion Square and Courtney Upshaw made this season a pleasure to watch. The 3 losses this season were a hard blow to the program, but these young men have played and carried themselves with class and distinction. For this gentlemen I salute you and your contribution to the Crimson Tide Nation! You afforded us the opportunity to chant with pride "Rammer Jammer Yellow Hammer Give em Hell ALABAMA!" Roooooooooollll Tide Roll!!!!

The Entitlement Syndrome

One of my favorite mantras is know your role. In today's society we all know the so-called dating scene is not what it used to be. The old-fashioned days of courtship that our parents and grandparents once knew is no longer. Today is the day of the jumpoff, cutbuddy, sidepiece, friend with benefits and gray area relationship. Commitment is no longer the order of the day, but with all these different unorthodox roles comes confusion. Women often settle for being the jumpoff, cutbuddy, sidepiece or whatever with the thought that they will be upgraded to wifey. Not saying this never happens, but more often than not it doesn't. However, while they are playing these roles they do not know their roles. They want to become possessive and have a sense of entitlement when it comes to the men with which they are having relations. This is understandable, however when you assume the role you really have no privileges and are not entitled to anything. On the other hand, men often have the entitlement syndrome when it comes to a woman with which they previously have had sex. They tend to think that once they got it they are always entitled to get it. This is not always so. Once (a woman with sense) realizes playing the role isnt worth it or moves on then the man is no longer priority. I'm not condemning anyone for playing any role they decide, however, I'm saying do not think you are entitled to anything outside of a monogamous relationship.